Ok well I phoned Audi and they might as well have laughed down the phone at me, but in no uncertain terms I was told that no they would not be retrofitting any features to the car and that's not a service they offer.
Got in touch with a couple of VW Audi specialists locally and been quoted £1200 from one place and the other place is going to get back to me, both suggested that enabling the Adaptive Cruise is no problem, all you need is the stalk adding and the relevant codes changed in the ECU.
Will update this thread when I actually go through with it.